正常的人都是相似的，不正常的人則各有各的不正常，
    這是對GA起早貪黑跟了5季之后的心得……
　　　　
    強烈要求編劇多加入幾個健康角色，類似bruke這種的，
    至少別那么擰巴，那么矯情，那么作，
    你愛我，我就不愛你，你不愛我，我就偏愛你，
    你給我的，我就不要，你不給我的，給不了我的，我就非要，
    我要的，我又不要了，我不要的，我又要了，
    你要分手，我就不分手，你不要分手，我就非分手，
    你進我退，你退我追，你駐我擾，你疲我打，
    關(guān)系不正常的時候，我小弟弟總是能隨便舉到處舉，關(guān)系一旦穩(wěn)固正常，我的小弟弟就怎么舉都不舉，
    你結(jié)婚我，我就非裝著不樂意結(jié)婚你，就忸怩、就作態(tài)、我就臨大典了，來賓都上齊了，還強烈要求上一次手術(shù)案子拿刀劃拉一下病人的肉，否則我就好像不夠堅守自我（真正自我夠強大的人至于么？）
    等到你不結(jié)婚我，我就心碎就酸楚就黯然，就重新發(fā)現(xiàn)你多么值得珍惜，就領(lǐng)悟有了你的幸福和沒了你的不幸福，就非愿意結(jié)婚你——早干嘛去了都？！
    就得要軍醫(yī)這樣的，才治得了這種愛作的女人，快斷氣了么？圓珠筆往氣管插上。皮開肉綻了么？訂書機趕緊釘上。有手術(shù)的可能么？立馬動上。喜歡了么？摁倒了親上。
    祈禱編劇好好寫啊，別給這個基礎(chǔ)大好的角色整惡劣了，整糾結(jié)了。
    他需要像植物一樣向陽、像獅子一樣健壯、剛猛、果決、體內(nèi)流動著純釀威士忌一樣的男性荷爾蒙。
　　　　
　　　　
    另，強烈要求編劇把Izzie這個人物/這個害蟲好好修理修理～～～
    煩得俺不行鳥，
    剛出來時明明還是個善良、堅強的good girl，誰知越發(fā)展人格越扭曲、變形，
    總一副救世主或人生導(dǎo)師的姿態(tài)，插手和干涉別人感情，
    實際上自己的那破人生卻料理得一塌糊涂、連夜漏雨、處處破洞，感情來得奇怪和草率，去得匆匆而莫明，
    剛還跟Alex那兒眉間心上、搞來搞去，轉(zhuǎn)臉Denny來，馬上便把Alex打進冷藏室，和Denny愛得驚天地、泣鬼神，眼神、微笑和淚水在整個病房里穿梭得、黏稠得水泄不通。
    接著Denny尸骨未寒便已人走茶涼，連忙饑不擇食插足george和Callie的婚姻，希望從中找心理平衡。
    她對george和Callie婚姻進行的破壞，可能談不上什么具體的邪惡動機，不過潛意識里絕對有一種類似寡母對兒子的獨占心態(tài)，既然死了Denny爹，就趕緊要把她滔滔不絕、無處安放的愛找個兒子角色傾泄出來，對Callie的冷嘲熱諷和惡意攻擊，看起來完全是惡婆婆對兒媳雞蛋里挑骨頭的姿態(tài)。
    把george搶過來，玩了幾天，發(fā)現(xiàn)情況完全脫離自己的預(yù)期，其實壓根也沒愛到當(dāng)初自己認為的那份兒地老天荒、死去活來，或說這個玩意兒也沒那么好玩，轉(zhuǎn)而便開始死死盯上Alex和eva。
    看到她每天跟在Alex的屁股后嘮逼叨嘮逼叨嘮逼叨，淚眼婆娑的排放出好像空谷回聲一樣延綿不絕的排比句：i care about you care about you care about you …………
    嘔麥告～～，俺真想像Alex那樣轉(zhuǎn)回頭去對她怒吼：shut up！stupid bitch??！
    這個女人對人家的幸福和不幸都要奮不顧身撲上去，嗡嗡縈繞上空，盤旋不去，完全只有蒼蠅方能夠做到，也完全只有蒼蠅方能夠形容～～

我怎么都忘不了grey對Derek鄭重其事地這樣說.

直到現(xiàn)在,她的神情,口吻,聲音,都不停回蕩在我腦海里,像一部自動播放機,反復(fù)而強烈.

有一點哀怨,多一點堅定,有一點撒嬌,多一點堅持.

堅持.是的.

在這里我想說的是,對于每天第一個迎接我們在真實世界蘇醒過來的太陽,對于偶爾一場來去無意地霜降,對于繁華世界瞬息萬變的人們,對于紛繁復(fù)雜需要面對的現(xiàn)實,對于更多不由自主的選擇與被選擇...

我們能不能也大聲地,深情地說一句:

choose me! pick me! love me! 呢?

總有人在說,生活總是要繼續(xù)的.
誠然如此,但我們能不能不要半推半就的生活?

我不想在經(jīng)歷了這樣一些挫折之后跟自己說我是不行的,原來我這么糟糕.我不想在經(jīng)歷一些失去之后跟自己說這是注定的,不是你的就不是你的.我不想在每天醒來之后不知道自己今天應(yīng)該做些什么,不知道哪些是我真的愿意去做的.我不想在每天睡覺之前對于明天是沒有任何期待的,甚至都沒有一件事能夠讓我醒來后從床上利索地下來開始行動的.
...
我通通不想
...
因為我要好好生活.

要讓溫暖的太陽選擇我,要讓美好的運氣選擇我,要讓勝利的快樂選擇我,要讓相聚的幸福選擇我,要讓旅行的喜悅選擇我...

要讓我的每一天都值得.去期待,去到達,去完成.

假如我還有80年的生命..80年就是960月..就是29200天...

接下來,我要好好愛我的每一個1/29200.
我要對你說:
I love you and i choose you.
Please,pick me and love me.

一
她長的算不上多么漂亮，只比克里斯丁娜·楊好看一些，沒有伊茲·斯蒂文那么性感。但是，她有一雙象是永遠沉浸在夢中的，水光蕩漾的眼睛。她有一個笑容，常常被霧籠罩的，有點無奈的，明知道蠢卻也非得這么做請你原諒的笑容。
她是梅莉迪斯·格蕾，西雅圖恩典醫(yī)院外科女實習(xí)醫(yī)生，她愛上了已婚的主治醫(yī)生德瑞克·德瑞克，注定要經(jīng)歷悲慘的感情生活。有朋友說劇集很好看，但是討厭這對男女主角，按他的話說就是沒一個爽快人。德瑞克愛格蕾，當(dāng)出軌的妻子把一紙離婚書給他，他卻退縮了，選擇了家庭卻又不肯放棄格蕾。我不討厭他，因為生活中確實有這樣的男人，在感情和內(nèi)心的道德律中間搖擺不定，哪個也不想舍棄，卻給所有相關(guān)的人包括他自己帶來痛苦。他的痛苦是真實的，他的感情也是真實的。只是他在生活中無法象在手術(shù)臺上那般決斷。
而格蕾只是愛著，她的理智不想這樣，但感情占了上風(fēng)，無法控制，無可救藥。所以每次在醫(yī)院，病房里，走廊上，看見德瑞克，她立刻迷失，束手無策，就象飛蛾，怎么樣也抑制不了向火苗撲去的渴望。
那是與生具來的本能，我理解。莉香對完治也是這么說的，愛上了一個人，有什么辦法呢？
二
伊茲也是這樣。
伊茲·斯蒂文，從小在拖車屋長大的女孩，靠給《男人幫》拍內(nèi)衣插頁賺夠了讀醫(yī)學(xué)院的學(xué)費。她以為自己可以成為一個好外科醫(yī)生的，但是她愛上了自己的病人，一個心臟功能衰竭卻有著溫暖笑容的男人，丹尼。
因此別的都不重要了。
為給愛人搶到一顆移植的心臟，她親手割斷了丹尼維持生命的管子，觸犯了作為一個醫(yī)生的所有禁忌，甚至法律，還把4個好友卷了進來。當(dāng)?shù)つ嵝褋淼哪且豢?，你看她臉上的光，那是透過最黑最重的云層一角射下的太陽的光輝。
那時侯我知道，丹尼活不了了。
編劇不會讓他活著。偷來的心臟不可能屬于他。
但我還是喜歡伊茲喜悅的神情，打心眼里向外發(fā)散的幸福，盡管那么短暫。
“……我覺得我的動作慢下來了。我的動作很慢，而我周遭的一切事物卻是那么快，我想回到過去，回到正常的樣子，而不是現(xiàn)在這個可憐的伊茲，穿著禮服躺在洗手間的地板上，跟他死去的未婚夫在一起，但是我回不去了……怎么會發(fā)生這種事？怎么會這樣結(jié)束？為什么我是孤獨一人？”
三
愛情不過是《實習(xí)醫(yī)生格蕾》的一部分。5個實習(xí)醫(yī)生，更多的要面對生死，面對抉擇，為一個生命作決定。
劇集里許多病例故事單拿出來都可以拍成一部優(yōu)秀的電影。
一場火車車禍，一根鋼管穿透了一對陌生男女，兩個只能活一個，要放棄那個傷更重但是痛時也能說笑話的女孩嗎？
一對老人，妻子只有6個月的生命，妻子瞞著丈夫，丈夫瞞著妻子，因為他們約定，要去威尼斯，在夕陽西下時候坐平底船穿過嘆息橋，傳說這樣就會永遠在一起。
一個女人晚期肺癌，她說，“我一輩子沒抽過煙，沒吸過大麻，從不喝酒，今天之前，10年沒吃過甜點，在別人眼里，是健康的化身，可我卻得了肺癌，很荒謬是嗎？我一輩子都壓抑，抑制每個沖動，遵守規(guī)則，現(xiàn)在我不要這么做了。我要找回我的生活。”
她拒絕了手術(shù)，出院了——“至少在我這么做的時候，我知道自己曾經(jīng)活過?！?br>生老病死，人生里所有的線索最后在這里交織，展現(xiàn)出真實與殘酷的一面，陰影中又有勇氣和美好。
四
心是我們活著的標(biāo)志。一顆健康的心就象戰(zhàn)鼓，把攜帶養(yǎng)分的血液及時泵到全身，是維持我們生命的動力系統(tǒng)。
人心千姿百態(tài)，梅雷迪斯·格雷癡情的心，克里斯丁娜·楊捉摸不定的心，伊茲·斯蒂文狂熱的心，喬治·梅利淳樸的心，亞里克斯·卡萊脆弱的心。最完美的心是住院醫(yī)生米蘭達.貝莉的，坦率近乎透明，真實如刀鋒入骨，被喚作納粹，卻在嚴(yán)厲中讓你體會真正的善良。
人心是脆弱的。冠心病，先心病，風(fēng)心病，心肌病……心會累，會疲倦，也想休息，逃避，時不時的怠工。有人想換掉，有人甘愿堅守。
所以西雅圖恩典醫(yī)院最好的心胸外科醫(yī)生伯克總是很忙，忙著用手術(shù)刀劃開胸腔，把一顆心拿出來，捧在手里，切切剪剪，縫縫補補。
那些受傷的心，有些死了，有些開始新生。
我最喜歡的斯丁的歌是關(guān)于心的，《Shape of My Heart》——我知道黑桃代表衛(wèi)兵的劍，我知道梅花是戰(zhàn)爭的槍，我知道鉆石象征著財富，但是那并非我心的形狀， That′s not the shape, the shape of my heart ……
亦舒小說里常提到洛史超域的一首歌，也是與心有關(guān)。《玫瑰的故事》中——氣漸漸有點涼意,我駕車上班,扭開無線電聽,紅燈的時候頭枕在駕駛盤上,無線電上在播放洛史超域的歌——“我不想說及/你如何碎了我的心/如果我再逗留一刻/你是否聆聽我的心/噢,心/我的心/我的老心”?！抖∠恪分小磉叿趴匆患苄⌒o線電，正在播放洛史超域那永遠不滅的歌：“如果我獨自站著，影子是否會掩藏我心的顏色，藍色是眼淚，黑色是天空運行的星，對你來說， 不會比一面鏡子更有意義……”我一向最愛洛史超域的慢歌，充滿感情的聲音訴說一些微不足道的瑣事，但這瑣事卻是愛情呢……
亦舒有個短篇就叫《破碎的心》——　我立刻注意到她脖子上掛的一條項鏈，紅色珊瑚的小珠子，串住一顆金色的心型墜子，本來很普通，但是那枚心在左上方卻是有裂痕的，細細的痕中嵌鑲著碎粒的藍寶石，像是心碎了，又復(fù)元了，但永遠留下難忘的瘀痕。
開頭是破碎的心，結(jié)尾也是——
我是一個成年人，以后的生活，再凄苦再空虛，我還是得若無其事地活下去。
但是我的心已碎。
可兒在我的生命中出現(xiàn)、消失，如一顆流星，閃亮后的黑暗，我也會學(xué)習(xí)習(xí)慣。
但要忘記她，卻也不是這么容易的一件事呢，每次看到穿白衣的女孩子，我的心使隱隱作痛。
我開始愛上洛史超域的一首歌：
——“我的心，我的老心，如果我再逗留一刻，你是否會聆聽我的心？”
看來，在我們一生中，心都是要破碎的，有的碎的多一點，有的少一點，有的很快就修補上了，有的留下疤痕，有的留下裂縫，也有的干枯至死。
只是，你的心，是否曾有人聆聽？

The best of this soap opera is voiceover in each episode. It intrigues me to scribble down every sentence of voiceover when watching it. It is food for thought. I like this way to say something about life, love, friend, job, responsibility, loneliness and so on in this series. It make me contemplating what has happened in my life.

Attached is what I record, share with "同好":

Season1

Episode 1: A hard Day’s night

The game. They say either a person has what it takes to play, or they don't.
There comes a moment when it's more than just a game. And you either take that step forward, or turn around and walk away.

E5: “shake your groove thing”

Remember when you were a kid and your biggest worry was, like, if you'd get a bike for your birthday, or if you get to eat cookies for breakfast. Being an adult? Totally overrated. I mean, seriously, don't be fooled by all the hot shoes and the great sex and the no parents anywhere telling you to do. Adulthood is responsibility. Responsibility, it really does suck. Really, really sucks. Adults have to be places and do things and earn a living and pay the rent. Kinda makes bikes and cookies look really really good, doesn't it?

The scariest part about responsibility: when you screw up and let it slip right through your fingers.
Unfortunately, once you get past the age of braces and training bras, responsibility doesn't go away.
It can't be avoided. Either someone makes us face it, or we suffer the consequences. And still, adulthood has its perks.

E6 “ If tomorrow never comes”

A couple hundred years ago, Benjamin Franklin shared with the world the secret of his success. "Never leave that till tomorrow," he said, "which you can do today." This is the man who discovered electricity. You'd think more of us would listen to what he had to say. I don't know why we put things off, but if I had to guess, I'd say it has a lot to do with fear. Fear of failure, fear of pain, fear of rejection. Sometimes, the fear is just of making a decision. Because, what if you're wrong? What if you're making a mistake you can't undo? Whatever it is we're afraid of, one thing holds true. That, by the time the pain of not doing a thing gets worse than the fear of doing it, it can feel like we're carrying around a giant tumor. And you thought I was speaking metaphorically.

The early bird catches the worm. A stitch in time saves nine. He who hesitates is lost. We can't pretend we haven't been told. We've all heard the proverbs, heard the philosophers, heard our grandparents warning us about wasted time, heard the damn poets urging us to seize the day. Still, sometime we have to see for ourselves. We have to make our own mistakes. We have to learn our own lessons. We have to sweep today's possibility under tomorrow's rug until we can't anymore, until we finally understand for ourselves what Benjamin Franklin meant. That knowing is better than wondering. That waking is better than sleeping. And that even the biggest failure, even the worst, most intractable mistake beats the hell out of never trying.

E07 “ The self destruct button”

I mean, if life's so hard already, why do we bring more trouble down on ourselves? What's up with the need to hit the self-destruct button? Maybe we like the pain. Maybe we're wired that way. Because without it, I don't know... ...maybe we just wouldn't feel real. What's that saying? "Why do I keep hitting myself with a hammer?" "Because it feels so good when I stop."

E08 “Save me”

You know how when you were a kid and you believed in fairy tales? That fantasy of what your life would be. White dress, Prince Charming, Who'd carry you away to a castle on a hill. You'd lie in bed at night and close your eyes, and you had complete and utter faith. Santa Claus, the Tooth Fairy, Prince Charming, they were so close, you could taste them. But eventually, you grow up. One day you open your eyes, and the fairy tale disappears. Most people turn to the things and people they can trust. But the thing is, it's hard to let go of that fairy tale entirely. Cause almost everyone still has that smallest bit of hope, of faith, that one day they'll open their eyes and it will all come true.

E09 “who’s zooming who”

Secrets can't hide in science. Medicine has a way of exposing the lies. Within the walls of the hospital, the truth is stripped bare. How we keep our secrets outside the hospital...Well, that's a little different. One thing is certain. Whatever it is we're trying to hide, we're never ready for that moment when the truth gets naked. That's the problem with secrets. Like misery, they love company. They pile up and up until they take over everything. Until you don't have room for anything else. Until you're so full of secrets, you feel like you're going to burst.

The thing people forget is how good it can feel when you finally set secrets free.Whether good or bad, at least they're out in the open, like it or not. And once your secrets are out in the open, you don't have to hide behind them anymore. The problem with secrets is even when you think you're in control... ...you're not.

Season 2

E1 “Raindrops keep falling on my head”

To be a good surgeon, you have to think like a surgeon. Emotions are messy. Tuck them neatly away and step into a clean, sterile room where the procedure is simple. Cut, suture and close. But sometimes, you're faced with a cut that won't heal. A cut that rips it's stitches wide open.

The say practice makes perfect. Theory is, the more you think like a surgeon, the more you become one. The better you get at remaining neutral, clinical. Cut, suture, close. And the harder it becomes to turn it off? to stop thinking like a surgeon. And remember what it means to think like a human being.

E2 “Enough is enough (no more tears)”

I have an aunt who, whenever she poured anything for you, would say, "Say when." My aunt would say, "Say when," and of course we never did. We don't say "when" because there's something about the possibility of more. More tequila. More love. More anything. More is better.

There's something to be said about a glass half full. About knowing when to say when. I think it's a floating line. A barometer of need and desire. It's entirely up to the individual. And depends on what's being poured. Sometimes all we want is a taste. Other times, there's no such thing as enough. The glass is bottomless. And all we want is more.

E3 “Make me lose control”

Surgeons are control freaks. With a scalpel in your hand, you feel unstoppable. There's no fear, there's no pain. You're 10 feet tall and bullet proof. And then you leave the O.R. And all that perfection. All that beautiful control just falls to crap.

No one likes to lose control but as a surgeon there's nothing worse. It's a sign of weakness. Of not being up to the task. And still there are times when it just gets away from you. When the world stops spinning. And you realize that your shiny little scalpel isn't gonna save you. No matter how hard you fight it. You fall. And its scary as hell. Except there's an upside to free falling. It's the chance you give your friends to catch you.

E4” deny, deny, deny”

The key to surviving a surgical internship is denial. We deny that we're tired, we deny that we're scared, we deny how badly we want to succeed, and most importantly, we deny that we're in denial. We only see what we wanna see and believe what we want to believe. And it works. We lie to ourselves so much that after a while, the lies start to seem like the truth. We deny so much that we can't recognize the truth, right in front of our faces.

Sometimes reality has a way of sneaking up and biting us in the ass. And when the damn bursts all you can do is swim. The world of pretend is a cage, not a cocoon. We can only lie to ourselves for so long. We are tired. We are scared. Denying it doesn't change the truth. Sooner or later, we have to put aside our denial ... and face the world head on gun's blazing. Denial. It's not just a river in Egypt. It's a freaking ocean. So how do you keep from drowning in it?

E5 “Bring the pain”

Pain comes in all forms. The small twinge, a bit of soreness, the random pain. The normal pains we live with every day. Then there's the kind of pain you can't ignore. A level of pain so great that it blocks out everything else. Makes the rest of the world fade away. Until all we can think about is how much we hurt. How we manage our pain is up to us. Pain. We anaesthetize...ride it out, embrace it, ignore it... And for some of us, the best way to manage pain is to just push through it.

Pain. You just have to ride it out. Hope it goes away on its own. Hope the wound that caused it heals. There are no solutions. No easy answers. You just breathe deep and wait for it to subside. Most of the time pain can be managed. But sometimes, the pain gets to you when you least expect it. Hit's way below the belt and doesn't let up. Pain. You just have to fight through because the truth is you can't out run it. And life always make more.

E6 “Into you like a Train”

In general... people can be categorized in one of two ways. Those who love surprises, and those who don't. I don't. I've never met a surgeon that enjoys a surprise, because, as surgeons we like to be in the know. We have to be in the know. Because when we aren't, people die and lawsuits happen. Am I rambling? I think I'm rambling. Ok, so my point actually ... and I do have one. Has nothing to do with surprises or death or lawsuits or even surgeons. My point is this: whoever said what you don't know can't hurt you was a complete and total moron. Because for most people I know, not knowing is the worst feeling in the world.

As surgeons, there are so many things we have to know. We have to know we have what it takes. We have to know how to take care of our patients. And how to take care of each other. Eventually we even have to figure out... how to take care of ourselves. As surgeons we have to be in the know. But as human beings, sometimes it's better to stay in the dark. Because in the dark, there maybe fear... ... but there's also hope.


E8 “Let it Be”

In the 8th grade, my English class had to read Romeo & Juliet. Then for extra credit, Mrs. Snyder made us act out all the parts. Sal Scafarillo was Romeo. As fate would have it, I was Juliet. All the other girls were jealous but I had a slightly different take. I told Mrs. Snyder that Juliet was an idiot. For starters, she falls for the one guy she knows she can't have. Then she blames fate for her own bad decision. Mrs. Snyder explained to me that when fate comes into play, choice sometimes goes out the window. At the ripe old age of 13, I was very clear. That love like life is about making choices. And fate has nothing to do with it. Everyone thinks it's so romantic. Romeo & Juliet. True love. How sad. If Juliet was stupid enough to fall for the enemy, drink a bottle of poison and go to sleep in a mausoleum ... ... she deserved whatever she got.

Maybe Romeo & Juliet were fated to be together, but just for a while. And then their time passed. If they could've known that beforehand maybe it would've all been ok. I told Mrs. Snyder that when I was growing up I'd take fate into my own hands. I wouldn't let some guy drag me down. Mrs. Snyder said that I'd be lucky if I ever had that kind of passion with someone. And that if I did, we'd be together forever. Even now I believe for the most part love is about choices. It's about putting down the poison and the dagger and making your own happy ending ... most of the time. And that sometimes despite all your best choices and all your best intentions, fate wins anyway.

E09: “Thanks for the memories”

Gratitude, appreciation, giving thanks. No matter what words you use, it all means the same thing. Happy. We're supposed to be happy. Grateful for friends, family, happy just to be alive... Whether we like it or not.

Maybe we're not supposed to be happy. Maybe gratitude has nothing to do with joy. Maybe being grateful is recognizing what you have for what it is. Appreciate small victories. Admiring the struggle it takes simply to be human. Maybe we're thankful for the familiar things we know. And maybe we're thankful for things we'll never know. At the end of the day, the fact that we have the courage to still be standing ... ... is reason enough to celebrate.

E10 “Much too much”

When you were a kid, it was Halloween candy. You hid it from your parents and ate it until you got sick. In college it was the heady combo of youth, tequila and well you know... As a surgeon you take as much of the good as you can get... because it doesn't come around nearly as often as it should. Cause good things aren't always what they seem. Too much of anything, even love is not always a good thing.

How do you know how much is too much? Too much, too soon. Too much information. Too much fun. Too much love. Too much to ask. And when is it all just too much to bear?

E11 “Owner of a lonely heart”

Forty years ago, The Beatles asked the world a simple question. They wanted to know where all the lonely people came from. My latest theory is that a great many of the lonely people come from hospitals. More precisely the surgical wings of hospitals. As surgeons we ignore our own needs so we can meet our patients' needs. We ignore our friends and families so we can save other people's friends and families. Which means that at the end of the day all we really have is ourselves. And nothing in this world can make you feel more alone than that.

400 years ago another well known English guy had an opinion about being alone. John Donne. He thought we were never alone. Of course it was fancier when he said it. No man is an island entire unto himself. Boil down that island talk and he just meant that all anyone needs is someone to step in. And let us know we're not alone. And who's to say that someone can't have 4 legs. Someone to play with or run around with. Or just hang out.

E12 “Grandma got run over by a reindeer”

It's an urban myth that suicide rates spike at the holidays. Turns out, they actually go down. Experts think that people are less inclined to off themselves when surrounded by family. Ironically, that same family togetherness is thought to be the reason depression rates actually do spike at the holidays.

There's an old proverb that says you can't choose your family. You take what the fates hand you... ...and like them or not, love them or not, understand them or not ... ...you cope. Then there's the school of thought that says the family you're born into is simply a starting point. They feed you and clothe you and take care of you until your ready to go out into the world. ...and find your tribe.

E13 “Begin the begin”

Fresh starts. Thanks to the calendar, they happen every year. Just set your watch to January. Our reward for surviving the holiday season is a new year. Bringing on the great tradition of New Year's resolutions. Put your past behind you and start over. It's hard to resist the chance at a new beginning. A chance to put the problems of last year to bed.

Who gets to determine when the old ends and the new begins? It's not a day on a calendar. Not a birthday, not a new year. It's an event, big or small, something that changes us. Ideally it gives us hope. A new way of living and looking at the world. Letting go of old habits, old memories. What's important is that we never stop believing, we can have a new beginning. But it's also important to remember that amid all the crap are a few things really worth holding on to.

E14 “Tell me sweet little lies”

As doctors we're trained to skeptical because our patients lie to us all the time. The rule is: every patient is a liar until proven honest. Lying is bad. Or so we're told. Constantly, from birth. Honesty is the best policy. The truth shall set you free. I chop down the cherry tree. Whatever. The fact is, lying is a necessity. We lie to ourselves because the truth, the truth freaking hurts.

No matter how hard we try to ignore it or deny it. Eventually the lies fall away. Whether we like it or not. But here's the truth about the truth. It hurts. So we lie.


E16: “It’s the end of the world”

It's a look patients get in their eyes. There is a scent. The smell of death. Some kind of sixth sense. When the great beyond is headed for you, you feel it coming. What's the one thing you've always dreamed of doing before you die?

E17 “As we know it”

In hospitals they say you know. You know when you're going to die. Some doctors say it's a look patients get in their eyes. Some say there's a scent. The smell of death. Something. There's just some kind of sixth sense. When the great beyond is heading for you. You feel it coming. Whatever it is. It's creepy. Because if you know. What do you do about? Forget about the fact you're scared out of your mind. If you knew this was your last day on Earth, how would you want to spend it?

(現(xiàn)在似乎流行這樣的假設(shè)，在北美大學(xué)，流行”last lecture”)

E18 “Yesterday”

After careful consideration and many sleepless nights, here's what I've decided. There's no such thing as a grown up. We move on, we move out, we move away from our families and form our own. But the basic insecurities, the basic fears and all those old wounds just grow up with us. And just when we think that life and circumstance have forced us to truly, once and for all become an adult ... We get bigger, we get taller, we get older. But for the most part, we're still a bunch of kids. Running around the playground trying desperately to fit in.

We whisper secrets with our best friends in the dark. We look for comfort where we can find it. And we hope. Against all logic. Against all experience. Like children, we never give up hope.

E19 “ What have I done to deserve this”

Ok so sometimes even the best of us make rash decisions. Bad decisions. Decisions we pretty much know we're gonna regret the moment, the minute, especially the morning after. I mean maybe not regret, regret because at least you know we put ourselves out there. But still ... something inside us decides to do a crazy thing. A thing we know that'll probably turn around and bite us in the ass. Yet, we do it anyway.

What I'm saying is ... we reap what we sow. What comes around goes around. It's karma and any way you slice it ... ... karma sucks. Like I was saying ... ... payback's a bitch.

One way or another, our karma, will leave us to face ourselves. We can look our karma in the eye or we can wait for it to sneak up on us from behind. One way or another, our karma will always find us. And the truth is as surgeons we have more chances than most to set the balance in our favor. No matter how hard we try, we can't escape our karma. It follows us home. I guess we can't really complain about karma. It's not unfair. It's not unexpected. It just ... evens the score. And even when we're about to do something we know will tempt karma to bite us in the ass ... ... well it goes without saying ... ...we do it anyway.

E20 “ Band Aid covers the bullet hole”

As doctors patients are always telling us how they would do our jobs. Just stitch me up, slap a band-aid on it and send me home. It's easy to suggest a quick solution when you don't know much about the problem. When you don't understand the underlying cause ... ... or just how deep the wound really is. The first step towards a real cure is to know exactly what the disease is to begin with. But that's not what people want to hear. We're supposed to forget the past that landed us here, ignore the future complications that might arise and go for the quick fix.

As doctors, as friends, as human beings we all try to do the best we can. But the world is full of unexpected twists and turns. And just when you've gotten the lay of the land, the ground underneath you, shifts. And knocks you off your feet. If you're lucky, you end up with nothing more than a flesh wound. Something a band-aid will cover. But some wounds are deeper than they first appear and require more than just a quick fix. With some wounds, you have to rip off the band-aid, let them breathe and give them time to heal.

E21 “Superstition”

My college campus has a magic statue. It's a long-standing tradition for students to rub it's nose for good luck. My freshman roommate really believed in the statue's power... ...and insisted on visiting it to rub it's nose before every exam. Studying might have been a better idea. She flunked out her sophomore year. But the fact is we all have little superstitious things that we do. If it's not believing in magic statues, it's avoiding sidewalk cracks, or always putting out left shoe on first. Knock on wood. Step on a crack, break your mother's back. The last thing we want to do is offend the gods.

Superstition lies in the space between what we can control... and what we can't. Find a penny, pick it up, and all day long you'll have good luck. No one wants to pass up a chance for good luck. But does saying it 33 times really help? Is anyone really listening? And if no one's listening, why do we bother doing those strange things at all? We rely on superstitions because we're smart enough to know we don't have all the answers. And that life works in mysterious ways. Don't diss the juju...from wherever it comes.

E22 “ The name of the game”

A good basketball game can have us all on the edge of our seats. Games are all about the glory, the pain and the play-by-play. And then there are the more solitary games. The games we each play all by ourselves. The social games, the mind games, we use them to pass the time. To make life more interesting. To distract us from what's really going on. There are those of us who love to play games. Any game. And there are those of us who love to play...a little too much.

Life is not a spectator sport. Win, lose or draw...the game is in progress...whether we want it to be or not. So go ahead: argue with the refs, change the rules...cheat a little...take a break...and tend to your wounds. But play. Play hard. Play fast. Play loose and free. Play as if there's no tomorrow. Ok, so it's not whether you win or lose...it's how you play the game. Right?

E23 “Blues for sister someone”

The key to being a successful intern is what we give up. Sleep, friends, a normal life. We sacrifice it all for that one amazing moment. That moment when you can legally call yourself a surgeon. There are days that make the sacrifices seem worthwhile. And then there are the days where everything feels like a sacrifice. And then there are the sacrifices that you can't even figure out why you're making.

A wise man once said, "You can have anything in life, if you will sacrifice everything else for it." What he meant is, nothing comes without a price. So before you go into battle, you better decide how much you're willing to lose. Too often, going after what feels good, means letting go of what you know is right. And letting someone in means abandoning the walls you've spent a lifetime building. Of course the toughest sacrifices are the ones we don't see coming. When we don't have time to come up with a strategy, to pick a side or measure the potential loss. When that happens, when the battle chooses us, and not the other way around, that's when the sacrifice can turn out to be more than we can bear.

E24 “Damage Case”

We all go through life like bulls in a china shop. A chip here, a crack there. Doing damage to ourselves. To other people. The problem is trying to figure out how to control the damage we have done. Or that's been done to us. Sometimes the damage catches us by surprise. Sometimes we think we can fix the damage. And sometimes the damage is something we can't even see.

We're all damaged, it seems. Some of us more than others. We carry the damage with us from childhood. Then, as grown-ups, we give as good as we get. Ultimately, we all do damage. And then...we set about the business of fixing...whatever we can.

E25 “17 seconds”

In life, we are taught that there are seven deadly sins. We all know the big ones: Gluttony, pride, lust. But the sin you don't hear much about is anger. Maybe it's because we think anger's not that dangerous. That we can control it. My point is, maybe we don't give anger enough credit. Maybe it can be a lot more dangerous than we think. After all, when it comes to destructive behavior... ...it did make the top seven.

So what makes anger different from the six other deadly sins? It's pretty simple really. You give in to a sin like envy or pride then you only hurt yourself. Try lust or coveting and you'll only hurt yourself, and probably one or two others. But anger...anger is the worst. The mother of all sins. Not only can anger drive you over the edge, when it does, you can take an awful lot of other people with you.

E26 “Deterioration of the fight or flight response”

Human beings need a lot of things to feel alive. We can't control it.

Season 3

E01 “Time has come today”

In the OR, time loses all meaning. In the midst of sutures and saving lives, the clock ceases to matter. 15 minutes. 15 hours. Inside the OR, the best surgeons make time fly. Outside the OR however, time takes pleasure in kicking our asses. For even the strongest of us, it seems to play tricks. Slowing down, hovering....until it freezes, leaving us stuck in a moment, unable to move in one direction or the other.

Time flies Time waits for no man. Time heals all wounds. All any of us wants is more time Time to stand up... time to grow up. Time to let go.

E02 “I am a tree”

At any moment, the brain has 14 billion neurons firing at a speed of 450 miles per hour. We don't have control over most of them. When we get a chill, goosebumps. When we get excited, adrenaline. The body naturally follows it's impulses, which I think is part of what makes it so hard for us to control ours. Of course, sometimes we have impulses we'd rather not control. That we later wish we had.

The body is a slave to its impulses. But the thing that makes us human... Is what we can control. after the storm. After the rush. After the heat of the moment has passed. We can cool off and clean up the messes we've made. We can try to let go of what was. And then again...

E03 “Sometimes a fantasy”

Surgeons usually fantasize about wild and improbable surgeries. Someone collapses in a restaurant; we splice them open with a butter knife. Replace a valve with a hollowed-out stick of carrot. But every now and then, some other kind of fantasy slips in. Most of our fantasies dissolve when we wake. Banished to the back of our mind. But sometimes we're sure, if we try hard enough, we can live the dream.

The fantasy is simple. Pleasure is good. And twice as much pleasure is better. That pain is bad. And no pain is better. But the reality is different. The reality is that pain is there to tell us something. And there's only so much pleasure we can take without getting a stomach ache. And maybe that's OK. Maybe some fantasies are only supposed to live in our dreams.

E04 “What I am”

At some point during surgical residency, most interns get a sense of who they are as doctors, and the kind of surgeons they're going to become If you ask them they'll tell you. They're going to be General surgeons. Orthopedic surgeons. Neurosurgeons. Distinctions that do more than describe their areas of expertise. They help define who they are. Because Outside the operating room, not only do most surgeons have no clue who they are, they're afraid to find out.

E05 “Oh, the guilt”

First, do no harm. As doctors we pledge to live by this oath. But harm happens. Then guilt happens, and there's no oath for how to deal with that.

First, do no harm. Easier said than done. We can take all the oaths in the world but the fact is... most of us do harm all the time.

Sometimes even when we're trying to help, we do more harm than good. And then the guilt rears its ugly head. What you do with that guilt is entirely up to you. We're left with a choice... Either you can let guilt thrown you back into the behavior that got you in trouble in the first place, or learn from the guilt, and do your best to move on.

E06 “Let the angels commit”

To make it... really make it as a surgeon, it takes major commitment. We have to be willing to pick up that scalpel that may or may not do more damage than good. It's all about being committed. Cause if we're not, we have no business picking up that scalpel in the first place.

There are times when even the best of us have trouble with commitment, and we may be surprised at the commitments we're willing to let slip out of our grasp. Commitments are complicated. We may surprise ourselves by the commitments we're willing to make. True commitment, takes effort, and sacrifice. Which is why sometimes, we have to learn the hard way, to choose our commitments very carefully.

E07 “Where the boys are”

As surgeons we're trained to look for disease. Sometimes, the disease is easily detected. Most of the time, we need to go step by step. First, probing the surface, looking for any sign of trouble. A mole or a lesion, or an unwelcome lump. Most of the time, we can't tell what's wrong with somebody just by looking at them. After all, they can look perfectly fine on the outside, while their insides tell us a whole different story.

Not all wounds are superficial. Most wounds run deeper than imagined. You can't see them with the naked eye. And then there are the wounds that take us by surprise. The trick to any wound or disease is to dig down deep and find the real source of the injury. And once you've found it... try like hell to heal that sucker.

E08 “staring at the sun”

Many people don't know that the human eye has a blind spot in its field of vision. There's a part of the world that we are literally blind to. The problem is, sometimes our blind spots shield us from things that really shouldn't be ignored. Sometimes our blind spots keep our lives bright and shiny.

When it comes to our blind spots, maybe our brains aren't compensating. Maybe they're protecting us.

E09 “From a whisper to a scream”

As doctors, we know everybody's secrets. Their medical histories, sexual histories, confidential information that is as essential to a surgeon as a 10-blade. And every bit as dangerous. We keep secrets. We have to. But not all secrets can be kept.

In some ways, betrayal is inevitable. When our bodies betray us, surgery is often the key to recovery. When we betray each other, the path to recovery is less clear. We do whatever it takes to rebuild the trust. And then there are some wounds that are so deep, so profound, that there's no way to repair what was lost. And when that happens, there's nothing left to do but wait.

E10 “Don’t stand so close to me”

At the end of the day, when it comes down to it, all we really want is to be close to somebody. So this thing where we all keep our distance, and pretend not to care about each other...it's usually a load of bull. So we pick and choose who we want to remain close to. and once we've chosen those people we tend to stick close by. no matter how much we hurt them. The people that are still with you at the end of the day, those are the ones worth keeping.

E13 “Great Expectations”

No one believes their life will turn out just kind of ok. We all think we're going to be great. And from the day we decide to become surgeons, we are filled with expectation. Expectations of the trails we will blaze, the people we will help, the difference we will make. Great expectations of who we will be, where we will go, and then we get there.

We all think we're going to be great. And we feel robbed when our expectations aren't met. But sometimes our expectations sell us short. Sometimes, the expected pales in comparison to the unexpected. You gotta wonder why we cling to our expectations, because the unexpected is just what keeps us steady...standing...still. The expected is just the beginning. The unexpected is what changes our lives.

E14 “wishing and hoping”

As surgeons we live in a world of worst-case scenarios. We cut ourselves off from hoping for the best because too many times the best doesn't happen. But every now and then something extraordinary occurs ... ...and suddenly best-case scenarios seem possible. And every now and then...something amazing happens. And against our better judgment, we start to have hope.

As doctors, we're trained to give our patients just the facts. But what are patients really want to know is. Will the pain ever go away? Will I feel better? Am I cured? What are patients really want to know is... ...is their hope. But inevitably there are times when you find yourself in the worst-case scenario. When the patient's body has betrayed them and all the science we have to offer has failed them. When the worst-case scenario comes true, clinging to hope is all we have left.

E15 “ walk on water”

Disappearances happen in science, disease can suddenly fade away. Tumors go missing. We open someone up to discover the cancer is gone. It's unexplained, it's rare, bit it happens. We call it misdiagnosis say we never saw it, any explanation but the truth. That life is full of vanishing acts. If something that we didn't know we had disappears, do we miss it?

E16 “drowning on dry land”

Like I said disappearances happen. Pains go phantom, blood stops running, and people fade away. There's more I have to say. So much more. But I've disappeared.

E17 “some kind of miracle”

There are medical miracles. Being worshippers at the alters of science we don't like to believe miracles exist, but they do. Things happen...we can't explain them, we can't control them, but they do happen. Miracles do happen in medicine. They happen every day just not always when we need them to happen.

At the end of a day like this, a day when so many prayers are answered and so many aren't... We take our miracles where we find them. We reach across the gap and sometimes against all odds, against all logic, we touch.

E18 “scars and souvenirs”

People have scars in all sorts of unexpected places. Like secret roadmaps of their personal histories... ...diagrams of all their old wounds. Most of our old wounds heal leaving nothing behind but a scar, but some of them don't. Some wounds we carry with us everywhere... ...and though the cuts long gone... ...the pain still lingers.

What's worse, new wounds which are so horribly painful... :...or old wounds that should have healed years ago and never did. Maybe our old wounds teach us something... ...they remind us of where we've been and what we've overcome. They teach us lessons about what to avoid in the future. That's what we like to think. But that's not the way it is, is it? Something's we just have to learn over and over and over again.

E19 “my favorite mistake”

Surgeons always have a plan, where to cut, where to clamp, where to stitch. But even with the best plans, complications can arise, things can arise and suddenly you're caught with your pants down.

The thing about plans is...they don't take into account the unexpected. So, when we're thrown a curve ball, whether it's in the OR, or in life. We have to improvise. Of course, some of us are better at it than others. Some of us just have to move on to Plan B and make the best of it. And sometimes... ...what we want... ...is exactly... ...what we need. But sometimes... Sometimes what we need is a new plan.

E20 “time after time”

A patient's history is as important as their symptoms. It's what helps us decide if heartburn's a heart attack, if a headache's a tumor. Sometimes patients will try to rewrite their own histories. They'll claim they don't smoke or forget to mention certain drugs, which in surgery can be the kiss of death. We can ignore it all we want. But our history, eventually, always comes back to haunt us.

Some people believe that without history our lives amount to nothing. At some point we all have to choose. Do we fall back on what we know... Or do we step forward to something new. It's hard not to be haunted by our past. Our history is what shapes us, what guides us. Our history resurfaces time after time after time. So we have to remember sometimes the most important history is the history we're making today.

E21 “Desire”

As interns we know what we want...to become surgeons. And will do anything to get there... Suffer through killer exams, endure 100-hour weeks, stand for hours on end operating rooms. You name it we'll do it. The tough part though is reconciling this huge thing we want, to be surgeons, with everything else we want.

To often, the thing you want most is the one thing you can't have. Desire leaves us heartbroken; it wears us out. Desire can wreck your life. But as tough as wanting something can be...(Addison pauses in front of the hospital)...the people who suffer the most are those who don't know what they want.

E22 “The other side of the life”

The dream is this: that we'll finally be happy when we reach our goals... ...find the guy, finish our internship. That's the dream; then we get there and if we're human, we immediately start dreaming of something else. Because if this is the dream then we'd like to wake up... ...now please.

At some point, maybe we accept that the dream has become a nightmare. We tell ourselves the reality is better. We convince ourselves it's better that we never dream at all. But the strongest of us, the most determined of us, we hold on to the dream. Or we find ourselves faced with a fresh dream we never considered. We awake to find ourselves...Against all odds...Feeling hopeful. And if we're lucky, we realize...In the face of everything, in the face of life...The true dream...Is being able to dream at all.

E23 “Testing”

A surgeon's education never ends. Every patient, every symptom, every operation...is a test, a chance for us to demonstrate how much we know...and how much more we have to learn.

 

      Denny出場時躺在病床上，眼睛始終跟隨著Izzie，他臉上所展開的笑容一下子抓住了我：舒展，明亮，由衷，和他溫柔的眼睛輝映著，很直接的傳遞著愛意，毫不掩飾?？粗@樣一張臉孔，我想任何女人的心都會蕩漾著暖意的。
      一個受著病痛折磨的人，卻一直保持著寬厚明朗的笑容，比任何健康強壯的人更豁達?？粗鳧enny，我有一種很強烈的感覺：生活是如此的動人。我想不起Izzie是怎樣愛上他的，可能就是這樣一分分一寸寸的潛移默化了。
      記憶中很揪心的一幕，是Denny第二次入院，因為病情惡化需要在清醒狀態(tài)中電擊來幫助恢復(fù)心臟功能。他在電擊時痛苦得大喊，然后對醫(yī)生說：我討厭你，你讓我像孩子一樣大聲喊叫，還是在我想取悅的女孩面前。Izzie緊張擔(dān)心的臉上一瞬間露出笑容——在自己遭受痛苦的時候還不忘發(fā)揮的可愛的幽默感，來安慰所愛的女人。這樣一個男人，足夠照亮一個女人的心。
      Izzie努力的勸說Denny接受安裝心臟輔助裝置的手術(shù)，來爭取更多等待移植的時間--看到這一部分的時候，其實我心里十分矛盾糾結(jié)。我希望他們能最終成為彼此的補償，哪怕是多一分鐘也好，不要留下遺憾?？捎种肋@樣的努力在給Denny的身體帶來多一次的痛苦。雖然Denny的臉上也開始露出疲憊失望，但他還是對著Izzie笑著，在她的鼓勵下再試一次，再試一次……哪怕明知這是渺茫的希望。有時候我在想，Izzie的愛是不是有些自私，可這又怎么來界定呢，百分之一的美好未來要用百分之九十九的痛苦來博取，是為了自己，也是為了對方，只有相愛的人才能這么去做吧。
      Denny終于從病床上站了起來，他們有了第一個擁抱。Izzie含淚微笑，說，你很高。
      為了爭取到心臟移植的優(yōu)先權(quán)，Izzie不惜觸犯法規(guī)，切斷Denny心臟裝置的電源線來惡化他的病情。這情到深處的鋌而走陷遭到Denny的反對，他溫柔的注視著這個為愛瘋狂的女孩，希望她能讓他安靜的離開。可這是一個不愿向命運服輸?shù)呐?，而Denny又是一個深情包容的男人。最終在她失控的喊著“求求你，求求你，就當(dāng)是為了我”的眼淚中，他抱住她，說了“好”。
      術(shù)后醒來的Denny重復(fù)了進手術(shù)室前的求婚，在得到Izzie“Yes”的回答后，他對身旁的Bailey醫(yī)生說：我哄她嫁給我了，我聰明吧。
      我們都以為新的生活就此展開了，可在Izzie挑選了三條禮服，終于穿著最漂亮的紫紅色裙子來到Denny面前時，他的心跳卻已經(jīng)停止了。不久以前他剛讓她感受過溫?zé)岬氖?，他們剛剛不可思議的訂下婚約……突然這一切都像從沒發(fā)生過一樣了。
      我有些不敢相信愛情故事就這樣結(jié)束了。其實在這樣一部美劇中，其他每個愛情都無外乎是相識，觸電，默契，一點點情緒作用，然后是性……并不是說不真摯，只是很速成。而Denny和Izzie的情感在這樣的環(huán)境中，就顯得格外不同了：不同與常理，簡直就像不是站在現(xiàn)實中的。所以才有了Izzie和同伴關(guān)于自己是否了解Denny的爭論。她不清楚他的工作，他的家人，他的朋友，他生活得方式……她只看到他作為病人，住在醫(yī)院的一面，從這些方面來說，她是不了解他。但了解并不會催生愛情，我很愿意相信這樣無關(guān)于一切，只關(guān)乎兩人之間單純的感覺的愛情，這的確是很不實際，更可能是很戲劇的。但我相信，人的心底都是有拋開一切世俗去愛的能力的，只是有沒有遇到那個能點燃你的人。
      Denny肯定是這樣的人。
      在我的心里，他幾乎等同于最明亮的笑容。

GA在實習(xí)醫(yī)生緊張的生活中加入了幽默的元素和人性的分析。

我覺得第二季是到目前最出色的，尤其是火車車禍，炸彈，大結(jié)局這幾集，都無可挑剔。如果原本有看了第一季覺得一般的朋友，只要看了這幾集肯定無法忘懷。

GA的人物、對白和配樂都很出色，唯一希望就是第三季少一些瓊瑤戲，多一些出彩的病例。

希望“越獄”熱潮中，GA能被更多人所識貨。

GA專題：http://www.meijumi.com/default.asp?cat=16

在看Grey's Anatomy第二季22集，Yang負責(zé)給一位有強迫癥的病人聽診，他不停撥弄燈的線控開關(guān)。Yang有點不耐煩說能不能停下來，病人說我也想，但抱歉不能，Yang沒辦法略帶厭惡表情嘆了口氣轉(zhuǎn)身走開。病人對旁邊的George說她瞧不起我，George否認。
 
“我知道她是，三年來我見得多了，特別是最像我的人反而最討厭我?！苯又鴨朰ang：“你是A型血，成績?nèi)珒?yōu)(straight A)，一直是班上最好的學(xué)生?”
Yang：“是?！?br>病人：“只是你把你的強迫意識用在了有創(chuàng)造性的方面，我們是同一類人，這就是你無法忍受我的原因。”
 
Yang是典型的亞裔美國人，融合了東亞人的勤奮刻苦，又有美國人的aggressive。她是所有實習(xí)生中最勤奮的，每天到得最早，病例背得最用心，不放棄任何一個上手術(shù)臺的機會。最初時George覺得壓力太大說外科醫(yī)生可能不適合自己，Yang就雄心勃勃地說外科是最hot的，是有男人味的，是海軍陸戰(zhàn)隊，不適合那些娘娘腔。她從不收拾屋子，把所有時間和精力都投入到工作上。她把Burke的頭巾放在儲物柜里，每天激勵自己要成為最偉大的外科醫(yī)生。總之，她是優(yōu)秀的，始終追求卓越的那類人。
 
讀書時聽過一種說法叫“優(yōu)秀是一種習(xí)慣”，這是一種看似謙遜實際很霸道的說法，我曾經(jīng)相信而且羨慕，有些人似乎從不認真念書，但考試總是第一，有人氣質(zhì)就是不同，天生的領(lǐng)導(dǎo)者。后來有機會跟一些牛X人物或并肩作戰(zhàn)，或成為對手，或最終超越，才發(fā)現(xiàn)這是一種很裝事兒的說法，他們都不像外表看起來那么輕松，私底下也在不停地自我激勵，也有脆弱消極的一面，畢竟天才非常有限。
 
追求卓越是一種精神上的強迫行為，習(xí)慣于完美的做事方式，不愿讓他人失望，不喜歡庸碌無為，嚴(yán)重時身不由己。
 
典型的強迫癥會不自主地把一件事重復(fù)若干次，比如片中的病人問OR是否干凈：“Is it clean,clean,clean?"Dr. McDreamy心領(lǐng)神會答道："It is clean,clean,clean".可見Sherperd的類型。