死而不亡者壽。

——老子（約前571-前471）1

我的經(jīng)歷開始于那個(gè)星期三的晚上就已經(jīng)夠不可思議了，第二天是感恩節(jié)。

我的瀕死體驗(yàn)

何塞·埃爾南德斯（Jose Hernandez）

視頻：//video.h5.weibo.cn/1034:4624051197640769/4624051786222915

我們?cè)谝恍╇娋€桿上安裝電線，我站在一個(gè)云梯車上，我說了這樣一句話，“如果我站在云梯上不動(dòng)，你在卡車上操作，給我換地方，可以省幾個(gè)小時(shí)的時(shí)間?！?/p>

我撞擊到了云梯的邊上右側(cè)，肋骨全部骨折，我受了重傷，送進(jìn)了急診室。

他們給我用了止痛藥，那藥含有一種消炎的成分，結(jié)果我對(duì)那種成分過敏，所以最終我的肺停止工作，我停止了呼吸，心臟停止了跳動(dòng)。

我面前出現(xiàn)了一個(gè)隧道，但不是通常被描述的那樣，我是墜落進(jìn)去的。我看到的只有色彩，從四面包圍著我，所以我已經(jīng)完全融合進(jìn)去了。

我能聽到這個(gè)色彩對(duì)我說話，有幾百萬個(gè)聲音，喋喋不休。

然后我往下看，我看到了海洋。然后我注意到一個(gè)人在水里，水深大概在膝蓋的位置。然后他突然轉(zhuǎn)過身，然后……

我死亡中最大的意外是，我的新生活，那是我父親。我和我父親在生活中，關(guān)系非常不好，我們甚至都無法擁抱，所以他去世的時(shí)候，我痛苦極了，真的很后悔，我們從來都沒能說出我們愛彼此，沒能說出我們?cè)诤酢?/p>

……于是我看著他在這方天地間，我說：“天啊，這是我的機(jī)會(huì)，我能夠和我父親講和的又一次機(jī)會(huì)?！?/p>

那在我的生命中，是永遠(yuǎn)都無法做到的。于是，我們擁抱了。我們說，我們愛彼此，我們愛彼此。

這次體驗(yàn)，改變了我人生中的方方面面?，F(xiàn)在我知道了，他在乎我，我知道了他愛我。

他擁抱我的時(shí)候，看著我，然后他放開了我，就那樣看著我，他說：“何塞，你需要回去?！?/p>

我看著他，說：“什么？你開什么玩笑？我喜歡這里，這里好棒，我不想回去?！?/p>

他對(duì)我說：“不行，你必須回去?！?/p>

雖然我當(dāng)時(shí)并不想回來，但我們算是達(dá)成了一種共識(shí)，我們都認(rèn)同，等我的死亡時(shí)間來臨，他會(huì)來接我。于是我說：“聽起來不錯(cuò)，我同意你的提議?！蔽揖痛┰交貋砹?。我感覺到一種拉力，感覺到我身體后方的傷。

我在陰間見到我父親的時(shí)候，我意識(shí)到，有時(shí)候，我們?cè)谶@里可能有些話無法說出口，但是，我們能在其他地方說出來。

擁有這次機(jī)會(huì)，真的治愈了我的靈魂。以前，我只是得過且過，并不是真正生活，并不是活著。

這種經(jīng)歷非常難以消化，死亡非常煎熬。我這次經(jīng)歷的幾年后，我開始繪畫。2

FALL INTO BLUE（落入藍(lán)中）何塞畫作

不知道，我以前從來沒畫過畫，最開始只是一種再創(chuàng)我所看到東西的渴望，我在一個(gè)有色彩的球中，這些色彩都在移動(dòng)，然后我變成了一抹色彩，就是這樣開始搞藝術(shù)的，只是一種想創(chuàng)造 3D 色彩感覺的渴望。

但隨著我畫得越來越多，我開始意識(shí)到，有更深層的東西，我開始感到治愈。

繪畫真的在治愈我，死亡會(huì)造成心理陰影，很難去消化，很難從中走出來。這個(gè)藝術(shù)和色彩的世界，給我的生活帶來了很多平靜與祥和，讓我感覺自己了解別人不知道的東西。

人們會(huì)問我，這次經(jīng)歷是真還是假，但是，我無法向你證明，我只能把我的經(jīng)歷分享給你。3

My Near-Death Experience?

Jose Hernandez

Artist

[Seattle InternationalAssociation forNear-Death Studies]

My experience startedincredibly enough, on a Wednesday evening.And it was Thanksgivingcoming up the next day.And we were running some electrical lines

on some polesand I was up on a bucket truck.We kind of said,"We could save a couple of hoursif I stay up on the bucketand you just maneuver the truckfrom space to space."

[murmuring]

I hit the side of the bucketand I broke all my ribs on my right side.I wound up in n emergency room.

They gave me a medication for painand it had some kindof an anti-inflammatory component.Turns out I'm allergic to it.So, ultimately, my lungs shut down,I stopped breathing and my heart stopped.

[water rushing]

There was a tunnel, but not the waythat it's typically described.I kind of fell into it.And what I saw was just colorwrapped all around me, so thatI was completely integrated into it.And I could hear this color talking to me.Millions of voices."Sssss." This chatter.

Then I look down and I see the ocean.And then I notice a man in the water.He's about knee deep.Then he turns around suddenly.

And, uh...the biggest surprise of my death,my new lifewas that it was my father.

[sniffles]

Me and my dad hada very difficult relationship in life.We couldn't even hug.So when he died, I felt totally bitterand really regretful of the factthat we never were able to saywe love each other or we care.

So I'm lookin' at him here in this space,and I'm saying, "Oh, my gosh.This is my opportunity.My second chanceto make peace with my dad."

[sobbing]

Something that I could never do in life.So...we hugged.

[sniffles]

[exhales]

[crying] And we said we loved each other.We loved each other.That has changed my life in so many ways.Just knowing that he did care.That he didlove me.

He looked at me when he embraced me.And he let go and he just looked at me.He said, "Jose. You need to go back."

I'm lookin' at him, like,"What? Are you kidding me?I like it here. This is great.I don't wanna go back."

And he said to me,"No, you gotta go back."

Whilst I didn't want to, uh...we came to, kind of,sort of an agreement, in a way.We-- we agreed that, when my time came,he would come get me and I said..."Well, that sounds likea pretty good deal. Let me go with that."And-- and I transitioned back.

I felt this sense of pulland I wound up back in my body.

When I met my dad on the other side...I realized thatsometimes, we may not be able

to say something herebutwe're gonna be ableto say it somewhere else.By having this opportunity...it truly healed my spirit.

Before, I just was moving through life.I wasn't living.I was not alive.

Thank you.

[NEW YORK CITY]

The dying is very difficult.A few years after my experience,I started painting.Had no idea. I'd never painted in my life.Initially, it was just a desireto reproduce what I sawwhere I was in a ball of colorand these colors were all moving,and I become the color.That's how I wound up doing art.Just a desire to try to createthat three-dimensional feeling with color.

But as I kept doing it more and more,I began to realizethat it's a lot deeper than that.It was healing.It was healing me.Dying is traumatic.And it's difficult to integrate

and-- and get past that.This world of art and colorbrought a lot of peace and calminto my life,and it made me feel a sense of knowing.

People ask meif the experience was real or not.At the end of the day,I can't prove to you.I can only share my experience with you.

1 出自老子《道德經(jīng)》第三十三章：

知人者智 自知者眀 勝人者有力 自勝者強(qiáng) 知足者富 強(qiáng)行者有志 不失其所者久 死而不亡者壽 晉右軍王羲之書太上玄元道德經(jīng) 早稻田文庫藏 //www.shuge.org/ebook/daodejingwxz/zh-hant/

2 何塞個(gè)人網(wǎng)站：//innerimmersion.org/

3 摘自網(wǎng)飛最新紀(jì)錄片《死而不亡》（Surviving Death，2021）自帶中文字幕，字幕翻譯：王成成。

?來源：//subscene.com/subtitles/surviving-death-first-season

這部紀(jì)錄片的片名“Surviving Death”，原是“死而復(fù)生”的意思，中譯為“死而不亡”，對(duì)于探索瀕死體驗(yàn)、靈媒、輪回這樣的話題，這個(gè)譯法更為貼切。

Surviving Death（2021） 死而不亡 第一集：瀕死體驗(yàn)（Near-Death Experience） 第二集：靈媒（上）（Mediums Part 1） 第三集：靈媒（下）（Mediums Part 2） 第四集：死后顯靈（Signs from the Dead）

第五集：看見死去的人（Seeing Dead People）

第六集：輪回（Reincarnation）紀(jì)錄片/真人秀 美國 英語 2021.1.6 美國 55 分鐘/集

? 全六集在線：//www.bilibili.com/video/BV17V411t7j3